The Power of Positive Thinking

Positive thinking is a mental attitude that admits into the mind thoughts, words and images that are conductive to growth, expansion and success. It is a mental attitude that expects good and favorable results.
A positive mind anticipates happiness, joy, health and a successful result.
Whatever the mind expects, it finds.
Not everyone accepts or believes in positive thinking. Some consider the subject as just nonsense, and others scoff at people who believe and accept it. Among the people who accept it, not many know how to use it effectively to get results. Yet, it seems that many are becoming attracted to this subject, as evidenced by the many books, lectures and courses about it. This is a subject that is gaining popularity.
It is quite common to hear people say: "Think positive!", to someone who feels down and worried. Most people do not take these words seriously, as they do not know what they really mean, or do not consider them as useful and effective. How many people do you know, who stop to think what the power of positive thinking means?
The following story illustrates how this power works:
Allan applied for a new job, but as his self-esteem was low, and he considered himself as a failure and unworthy of success, he was sure that he was not going to get the job. He had a negative attitude towards himself, and believed that the other applicants were better and more qualified than him. Allan manifested this attitude, due to his negative past experiences with job interviews.
His mind was filled with negative thoughts and fears concerning the job for the whole week before the job interview. He was sure he would be rejected. On the day of the interview he got up late, and to his horror he discovered that the shirt he had planned to wear was dirty, and the other one needed ironing. As it was already too late, he went out wearing a shirt full of wrinkles.
During the interview he was tense, displayed a negative attitude, worried about his shirt, and felt hungry because he did not have enough time to eat breakfast. All this distracted his mind and made it difficult for him to focus on the interview. His overall behavior made a bad impression, and consequently he materialized his fear and did not get the job.

Jim applied for the same job too, but approached the matter in a different way. He was sure that he was going to get the job. During the week preceding the interview he often visualized himself making a good impression and getting the job.
In the evening before the interview he prepared the clothes he was going to wear, and went to sleep a little earlier. On day of the interview he woke up earlier than usual, and had ample time to eat breakfast, and then to arrive to the interview before the scheduled time.
He got the job because he made a good impression. He had also of course, the proper qualifications for the job, but so had Allan.
What do we learn from these two stories? Is there any magic used? No, it is all natural. When the attitude is positive, we enjoy pleasant feelings and visualize what we really want to happen. This brings brightness to the eyes, more energy and happiness. The whole being broadcasts good will, happiness and success. Even the health is affected in a beneficial way. We walk tall, our voice is more powerful, and our body language shows the way we feel.
Positive and negative thinking are contagious.
All of us affect the people we meet, in one way or another. This happens instinctively and on a subconscious level, through our thoughts and feelings, and through body language. People sense our aura, and are affected by our thoughts, and vice versa. Is it any wonder that we want to be around positive people, and prefer to avoid negative ones? People are more disposed to help us, if we are positive, and they dislike and avoid anyone broadcasting negativity.
Negative thoughts, words and attitude bring up negative and unhappy moods and actions. When the mind is negative, poisons are released into the blood, which cause more unhappiness and negativity. This is the way to failure, frustration and disappointment.

Practical Instructions

In order to turn the mind toward the positive, some inner work is required, since attitude and thoughts do not change overnight.

• Read about this subject, think about its benefits, and persuade yourself to try it. The power of thoughts is a mighty power that is always shaping our life. This shaping is usually done subconsciously, but it is possible to make the process a conscious one. Even if the idea seems strange, give it a try. You have nothing to lose, but only to gain.
  
• Ignore what other people might say or think about you, if they discover that you are changing the way you think.
  
• Use imagination to visualize only favorable and beneficial situations.
  
• Use positive words in your inner dialogues, or when talking with others.
  
• Smile a little more, as this helps to think positively.
  
• Once a negative thought enters your mind, you have to be aware of it, and endeavor to replace it with a constructive one. The negative thought will try again to enter your mind, and then, you have to replace it again with a positive one. It is as if there are two pictures in front of you, and you have to choose to look at one of them, and disregard the other. Persistence will eventually teach your mind to think positively, and to ignore negative thoughts.
  
  In case you feel inner resistance and difficulties when replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, do not give up, but keep looking only at the beneficial, good and happy thoughts in your mind.
  
• It doesn't matter what your circumstances are at the present moment. Think positively, expect only favorable results and situations, and circumstances will change accordingly. If you persevere, you will transform the way your mind thinks. It might take some time for the changes to take place, but eventually they will.
  
• Another useful techniques is the repetition of affirmations. This technique resembles creative visualization, and can be used in conjunction with it.

The other articles at this website, about the power of concentration, will power, self-discipline and peace of mind, also contribute to the development of a positive mind, and are recommended for reading and practicing.

The Power of Affirmations

Affirmations are positive statements that describe a desired situation, and which are repeated many times, in order to impress the subconscious mind and trigger it into positive action. In order to ensure the effectiveness of the affirmations, they have to be repeated with attention, conviction, interest and desire.
Imagine that you are swimming with your friends in a swimming pool. They swim fifteen rounds, something you have never done before, and as you want to win their respect, you want to show them that you can make it too. You start swimming, and at the same time keep repeating in your mind, "I can do it, I can do it...". You keep thinking and believing that you are going to complete the fifteen rounds. What are you actually doing? You are repeating positive affirmations.
Most people repeat in their minds negative words and statements concerning the situations and events in their lives, and consequently, create undesirable situations. Words and statements work at both ways, to build or destroy. It is the way we use them that determines whether they are going to bring good or harmful results.
Often, people repeat negative statements in their minds, without even being aware of what they are doing. Do you keep thinking and telling yourself that you cannot do something, you are too lazy, lack inner strength, or that you are going to fail? Your subconscious mind accepts as true what you keep saying, and eventually attracts corresponding events and situations into your life, irrespective whether they are good or bad for you, so why not choose only positive statements?
Affirmations program the mind in the same way that commands and scripts program a computer. The repeated words help you to focus your mind on your aim, and automatically build corresponding mental images in the conscious mind, which affect the subconscious mind, in a similar manner to creative visualization. The conscious mind, the mind you think with, starts this process, and then the subconscious mind takes charge. By using this process consciously and intently, you can affect your subconscious mind, and thereby, transform your habits, behavior, mental attitude, and reactions, and even reshape your external life.
Sometimes, results appear quickly, but often more time is required. Depending on your goal, sometimes, you might attain immediate results, and at other times, it might take days, weeks, months or more. Getting results depends on several factors, such as the time, focus, faith and feelings you invest in repeating your affirmations, on the strength of your desire, and on how big or small is your goal.
It is important to understand that repeating positive affirmations for a few minutes, and then thinking negatively the rest of the day, neutralizes the effects of the positive words. You have to refuse to think negative thoughts, if you wish to attain positive results.

How to Repeat Affirmations

It is advisable to repeat affirmations that are not too long, as they are easier to remember. Repeat them every time your mind is not engaged in something important, such as while traveling in a bus or a train, waiting in line, walking, etc., but do not affirm while driving or crossing a street. You may also repeat them in special sessions of 5-10 minutes each, several times a day.
Relax any physical, emotional or mental tension while affirming. The stronger the concentration, the more faith you have in what you are doing, the more feelings you put into the act, the stronger and faster will be the results.
Choose only positive words, describing what you really want. If you desire to lose weight, do not tell yourself "I am not fat" or "I am losing weight." These are negative statements, bringing into the mind mental images of what you do not want. Say instead, "I am getting slim" or "I have reached my right weight". Such words evoke positive images in the mind.
Always affirm in the present tense, not the future tense. Saying, "I will be rich", means that you intend to be rich one day, in the indefinite future, but not now. It is more effective to say, and also feel, "I am rich now", and the subconscious mind will work at overtime to make this happen now, in the present.
The power of affirmations can help you to transform your life. By stating what you want to be true in your life, you mentally and emotionally see and feel it as true, irrespective of your current circumstances, and thereby attract it into your life.

Positive Affirmations

- I am healthy and happy.

- Wealth is pouring into my life.

- I am sailing on the river of wealth.

- I am getting wealthier each day.

- My body is healthy and functioning in a very good way.

- I have a lot of energy.

- I study and comprehend fast.

- My mind is calm.

- I am calm and relaxed in every situation.

- My thoughts are under my control.

- I radiate love and happiness.

- I am surrounded by love.

- I have the perfect job for me.

- I am living in the house of my dreams.

- I have good and loving relations with my wife/husband.

- I have a wonderful and satisfying job.

- I have the means to travel abroad, whenever I want to.

- I am successful in whatever I do.

- Everything is getting better every day.

Spiritual Awakening, Enlightenment, Consciousness, Being, Freedom

Tell-a-Friend

Tom was sitting on the floor, in front of an Indian guru, in an ashram in India. He was experiencing a sort of immense inner happiness, which he has never experienced before. His mind was calm and relaxed, and his thoughts were not as frantic as they used to be. He was sure that what he was experiencing was going to change his life.

Though it was a very hot day, he hardly felt the heat, and kept looking into the eyes of his guru, oblivious to his surroundings. Suddenly a feeling of great bliss began streaming throughout his entire body and mind, making him feel light and slightly giddy. He was experiencing a sense of vastness and endlessness, and was so content and happy that he wished this state would never end.
It was difficult for him to think. His mind as if stopped working, but his consciousness became vibrant and alive. This lasted for about half an hour, and then gradually he started returning to his ordinary consciousness. Tom was now certain he became enlightened, and that he has realized his true Self.
Some time later he started believing that due to his spiritual experience he could become a spiritual teacher. But can he become a teacher? Has he really attained this so called "Realization of the Self"? Is there really such a thing called enlightenment? And if there is, what is it?
Throughout the ages mystics, yogis, saints and philosophers have been seeking the answer to the riddle of life. Many believe that enlightenment - spiritual awakening is the answer. Nowadays, it seems that there is a tendency to seek instant enlightenment, like instant coffee, and to interpret all kinds of experiences as enlightenment or spiritual awakening.
The mind seeks and invents all kinds of theories. It works with concepts and words. It discusses and analyzes everything and is restricted to its own content. To every answer there is another question. Thoughts are endless and any theory is only a mental invention invented by the mind.
What are called facts are also in the realm of the mind. The mind can find reasons and excuses for everything. Whether you like it or not, whether you accept it or not, the mind rules your life and is your master. You see, interpret and react to life through its filters, habits and tendencies.
Has Tom really realized his Self? For a short time, due to his desire, expectations and the influence of the Master, Tom experienced a different kind of consciousness. It has not yet become permanent. The memory of the experience will persist, making him eager to repeat it. Yet, the habits of the mind cannot change overnight. He had a glimpse. The veil over the vast ever-present Consciousness was lifted momentarily, because the mind has become silent for some time, letting him experience this inner state.
What does Tom has to do now? Has he reached the final Spiritual Realization? Has he achieved spiritual awakening? No, the real work begins now. Concentration power, that is the power to hold the attention on one single object or subject, is needed. If it is strong that is fine. If not, it can certainly be improved by appropriate exercises, some of which can be found at this web site.
When the concentration ability is well developed, it is much more easier to silence the mind. When the mind is silent, thoughts do not distract, and worries do not trouble. When there are no clouds, the bright beautiful sun is seen. When there are no thoughts, the ever-present sweetness of the Self is experienced.

Techniques

Think and meditate about the mind, and how it involves you in all kinds of schemes and desires. Try to watch how the mind works, and how thoughts arise. For a while become an observer of your mind and its thoughts. Follow the way they arise, move and make way to other thoughts. Pay attention how they entice you to think them.
Now you have done something you may have never done before. You have thought about your thoughts, you have viewed the mind from the outside, as if you were watching someone else's mind. Without realizing it, you have watched the mind as if you were separate from it. Wow! Think about it!
Now I ask you, who are you, the mind and its thoughts, or the one watching the mind? If you have followed the above advice, then you have made a great discovery: You are not the mind. You are the one who is watching it.
It is possible to develop the habit of looking at the mind as if from the outside, as if it is not yours. Try not to be involved in the thoughts and desires that arise, and at least in theory, separate yourself from the mind. Just convince yourself that it is not you. Do it often, until you really start to see that you are separate from the mind, which is some kind of a power you can use.
Each day devote some time watching how thoughts enter your mind. Don't try to think, just follow their movement dispassionately. Watch how they come, try to claim your attention, grow, then wither, and new thoughts arise.
By experience you will come to appreciate how great and useful is this way of treating the mind. If your concentration ability is strong enough, it will be easier and faster to reach the conclusion that you are not the mind.
If you treat your thoughts with indifference, you will experience inner silence. In this silence there is happiness, power, content and the certainty that nothing can harm or disturb you anymore. By "you", I do not mean your body, I mean you, your consciousness that at this moment of inner silence you consider as yourself. You now know without the slightest doubt that you are not your thoughts or mind, but something bigger and vaster.

A different kind of Consciousness

When there are no thoughts, there is no vacuum. There is a feeling of beginning-less and endless consciousness and awareness. Not awareness of something, but just awareness. You can get some idea of what I mean, if you remember how you felt in a completely dark and quiet room. You could see and hear nothing, yet you were conscious. It was some sort of lack of sensory perception, yet you had full consciousness. Not consciousness of something, but just awareness of yourself. It is the same here, but vaster.
It is not the body that enters a peculiar and different state. It is neither the mind, because it is silent. At this moment there are no concepts or thoughts in the mind. As there are no thoughts, this consciousness cannot be an illusion, as it is the mind that creates illusion, and it is not present now.
This consciousness is not something new. It is not something strange, peculiar, unnatural or supernatural. It the substratum of our life, but we never pay it attention. We let the mind rule and create our life. You may not accept it, but what we call life, is actually a dream, a sort of a movie weaved by the mind. We never stop to think and examine the mind and its thoughts. We have got accustomed to live in the mind, rely on it, and accept whatever it presents us.
This Consciousness you are reading about is real, eternal, one and indivisible. Due to ignorance and the way the mind works, we consider ourselves as a separate organism with body and thoughts.
From the standpoint of the Indian philosophy Advaita-Vedanta all is illusion-Maya. It is only the One great Universal Consciousness that exists. While sleeping and dreaming, we see a world. This life we call awakening is also a dream, but a longer one. When we stop our thoughts and quieten the mind, we find out who we are and always were. When the coverings and sheets of the mind are removed, we see reality as it really is.

Further Steps

Now here is another strange suggestion. Try to watch the watcher of the mind, the witness. Try to find who is it that is looking at the mind. You are watching your thoughts. You see them pass by. Every now and then you find yourself immersed in your thoughts, and then you bring yourself back to watching the thoughts. Try to find out who this watcher is. Do not think or use words, just try in an intuitive way to find the watcher.
The next step will be to transfer your awareness into the watcher of the witness of the mind. Experience and intuition will show you the way. These are not mere words, or a kind of mind acrobatics. If you go step by step you will surely realize what I mean.
Stop even witnessing the mind. It is a step that may come naturally by itself, because of what you have been doing. You will feel in a natural way, that you are the silence that is experienced. Not you, as a definite, limited personality, but 'you', as an endless consciousness. You experience, or rather become, happiness, joy, power, calmness, and great inner silence.
This experience can come suddenly or gradually, but to make it permanent, you have to train yourself each day, not only when alone in your room, but in all situations. The rewards are every great. Peace of mind, happiness, great inner power, a taste of eternity and great real freedom.
In this state you experience your "Inner Consciousness" constantly. Then you do not even need to watch the mind. It will then be naturally supervised by a higher awareness.

Enlightenment - Spiritual Awakening

So, is there such a thing as enlightenment? It is a word, a concept. The word is not important, the experience is important. Even the word "experience" is inappropriate. Experience is something that happens. It may come again or it may not. I am speaking about something permanent, not transitory. I am speaking about the realization that you are not the mind, but something vaster.
In enlightenment, which is spiritual awakening, the mind, which loves to define and label everything, is not a part of this "experience", and therefore it cannot describe it properly.
Spiritual awakening, and the realization that you are not the mind dawns as you disentangle yourself from the mind. When you know first hand that you are not the mind, you realize who you are. You lift the veil of the mind and see Reality as it is.
This is a state of real freedom, when events, circumstances, habits and thoughts do not disturb or affect you on the inner level, and you come to understand that your life, your true essence, is actually beyond the world of thoughts. You may continue your daily life as it is, living and acting in this world, but yet being out of this world.
Read and reread this article until you truly understand the meaning. Give this subject some thought and time, and consider what it can do to your life if taken seriously. You can start walking on the spiritual path right from the point where you are now, because the Spirit has no particular place, it is everywhere.
The subject of this article has been shrouded in mystery and misunderstanding. This has happened because the mind that tries to describe a state it has never experienced. Each experience one has, is interpreted in accordance with previous experiences. There are always comparisons. But the mind has never experienced enlightenment, so all its theories about it are just mental concepts, which have nothing to do with the real meaning.
Enlightenment is not something to be reached, not something to be gained. It is just the removal of erroneous concepts, attitudes and thoughts. It is making the mind silent. That is all.
The way is open to everyone who is willing to step on this path. You can engage in a spiritual quest, no matter whether you are living in an ashram in India, in a cave, in a monastery or in a small town or a big city. It does not matter whether you are rich or poor, single or married with children, working or retired. All you need is a strong desire, and finding some time to be alone for the inner work.

Meeting People at Their Level

Meeting People at Their Level

I'm going to break one of my rules...all right it's not really a rule. It's more of a guideline. Typically, I don't like to talk about spiritual levels. It's too confusing for people still very much in the ego mind. It's okay to be in this space--this describes most of humanity. But for the sake of speaking to those of you who are going through awakening shifts, I feel like it's helpful to give you a loose framework for integrating these shifts and for understanding how to be with people during a transitional time that can be challenging. To do so is to learn how to meet people where they are without judgment.

When You've Got Nuthin in the Tank
When you're really open and you've got no energy left-over for anyone else, it will feel like no one can meet your needs. Everyone around you feels like a drain, and it's very frustrating because you feel so open. Truly, being able to have so few boundaries is a gift, and as you connect with more deeply aware and open people, you'll be amazed at how effortless connecting deeply is. You'll see how little time matters in getting to know someone. It's not like the ego's stupid levels, which for getting to know someone would go like this:

• First I have to see if this person is trustworthy, which usually means that they think and talk like I do (which doesn't actually have anything to do with trustworthiness, but it's how the ego judges these things).
• Second, we need to spend a bunch of time together (depending on the person days, weeks, years).
• Third, I might share something slightly intimate or revealing, but if I don't get the response I want, then that person is outta here.

But when you have no energy, it doesn't matter for the most part where anyone is at. You have to take care of yourself, and that usually means spending a lot of time with God and Mother Earth (nature walks are super helpful when you can't meditate anymore and just gotta move). Because the first thing you are learning during an awakening is that you absolutely have to bring all of your energy to bear on yourself. You're simply in too deep of a shift to run around connecting with everyone. It's not that time. The butterfly doesn't fly all over the place when it's still transforming in the chrysalis.

On Your Good Days, Swimming Back to Shore
Another metaphor that I've used for some time now is the metaphor of swimming out to the deep water. The deep water is the space of God: the divine mother and the divine father (To me, God really is both). You will have some friends who can swim out into that water with you, and during your more intense shifts, your deepwater friends may be the only ones withwhom you can be. But when you are in a lull, you may be able to swim back closer to shore where more of humanity is hanging out. This is meeting people at their level. Some people can only handle 3 inch deep water, some 3 feet deep water, and some won't even get into the water.

As you grow and develop, your awareness is opening, allowing you to see what depth someone can go to. A set of football buddies may not be able to swim out into the depths of the ocean with you (although people can surprise you, so giving people a chance from time to time is definitely a good idea). And if you expect them to, you're going to get really frustrated. So you learn to be in the depth that they can take, and when you need to swim out to the deeper parts of the ocean, you do that to take care of yourself. You're going to have real trouble dragging people out into deep water, and it isn't your choice to take them there. If loved ones don't want to be in that space, you must honor it even if it feels like it's getting lonely out in the middle of the ocean. That feeling is temporary. It's part of the ego that's still dissolving and is clinging onto you. As it dissolves and you become even more spiritually buoyant, you'll be able to swim out even further. =)

Continuing to Make New Friends
And of course, as you swim out further, you may find other people who can swim out to these new depths. It's important to understand that you aren't forsaking all your old friends. That too is an ego idea. You truly are learning how to honor the depths that you need to go, and that requires a lot of courage and self-love. Because ultimately, any of us playing small is a waste of our lives, if ever there was a way to waste it. Certainly, you can live your life anyway you want to, but the great change that we're all ushering into this world is being built off of this expansion. It's being built off of this amazing courage to be ourselves in our fullness and to not shrink within the confines of expectations and fears that tell us that we'll be alone, forgotten, or that we're evil people for leaving others behind. If anything, we are helping to show the way out into the deep waters and a more fulfilling way to live. Isn't it time to leave those shallow waters for something better?

When to Express and When to Let Go
For some people, you'll find a time to explain what you're doing so they don't feel left behind on shore, and for others, you'll simply need to let go without explanation. You can't expect others to understand what you're doing. Consider another metaphor: how do you explain an advanced calculus problem to someone who hasn't even learned Algebra yet? While the tenets and ideas of spirituality are simple enough, there's a level of consciousness that has to be present to fully understand and appreciate what you're doing. If one of your friends has severe abandonment issues, then to tell them that you feel like the relationship has completed for you will still ignite those issues. You can't account for other people's reactions. You can only tune in more deeply to your needs, your inner guidance, and your truth.


Trusting Your Actions and Your Words
Furthermore, I encourage you to deeply trust your actions and your words. As you embody this awakening energy, you're going to be more and more aligned with your truth. Trust what you have to say when you feel the need to say it, and trust what you are doing when you feel the call to take action. Part of having this awareness will lead you to naturally meet people where they are. You'll understand when someone only understands basic math, and when it's appropriate, you may explain something to someone in those terms. You'll know that to explain it in advanced calculus really won't make sense, and while what you may say may not be exactly correct, you're also learning learn where being exact does and does not matter. The real truth here is that you do know what to do and how to be with people, and it's time to let any remaining concerns about this dissolve.

Expectations from the Old Ego, Still Fighting the Currents
Still, it is perfectly normal for all of us to want to feel that our needs are being met. It can be a lonely road at times, but this is when we focus on our connection to God. Depending on your situation and the energy that you are, you may need a lot of space, and perhaps no one in your immediate life can really hold space to nurture you. Or perhaps, you're simply not letting people in. It's a real balance, and that's why--as I always say--you absolutely need to be developing, cultivating, and trusting your inner knowing. For those of you who have very powerful spiritual teachers nearby or very in-tune spiritual friends, there are definitely times for letting them swim out to your level of awareness to be with you during your shifts. You will likely have to learn how to express some of your needs so that they know how to support you because everyone's needs are different. But the key thing is to honor these shifts and to not get caught up in trying to make those who aren't in this space try to perform a function for which they are not suited or prepared. It's like hoping your turtle will give birth to kittens; it's just not going to happen.

Conscious Shifting: How Long Does This Last?
As I'll always remind you, these shifts last as long as they need to; they last as long as you need them to. Where you are going, only you can say, but as you learn to release fully into your shifts, you'll will be able to re-meet some people who've been in your life in the past. The relationships will likely have to change to accommodate this new space you're in, but you'll be more able to meet people in denser vibrations without it really disturbing you. It won't be as bothersome, although it's unlikely that you'll want to hang out there. You'll probably find out that the deep water suits you just fine, and swimming with God at your side isn't that lonely after all.

Learning How to Learn on the Spiritual Path

Learning How to Learn on the Spiritual Path

I've been noticing different spiritual "teachers" being afraid to use the term "teacher" lately. It really has to do with the fact that a lot of people have forgotten how "learning" actually works. We've been so inundated with rote memorization and mimicry that we confuse that as "learning." I remember loving my discussion-based classes in college because in those classes, the teacher was challenging us to think for ourselves. In that way, I guess I had to wait until college to get to some real teachers (at least regularly--I did have a few good ones through elementary to high school for sure).

In this vein of thought, I wanted to talk to you about learning how to learn because on the spiritual path, the teacher isn't giving you anything you don't already have. And just walking around trying to act like the teacher isn't learning. It's really just silly.

Unlearning How You Have Learned
All the Star Wars fans know where I got the above subhead. The famous line that Yoda says to Luke is that "You must unlearn what you have learned." But along with unlearning the falsities that you believe in (like you need to be successful in making lots of money or be pretty), you also have to unlearn all the faulty mechanisms for learning. The basic way that many of us are taught to learn is to simply swallow whole whatever the appointed teacher has to offer. Initially, challenging the teacher is considered insubordinate and improper. On the spiritual path, it's not that you are going to fight all the things a spiritual teacher has to say, but you're going to weigh what the teacher has to say against your own inner knowing. Only you can ever know what is right for you, but ah well, getting in touch with that internal knowing is half if not the whole battle, isn't it?

Ditching Your Third Party Support Mechanism
In this subhead, I'm referring to looking to others for internal answers. Now, there's a big difference between internal and external world answers. Here's an external world answer that I'll seek someone out to help me with: "How do I flush my radiator?" I have no idea. But there are other people who do, so I'll go find them to get help with that. Here's an internal question: "What's in my heart to offer to the world?" No one can tell you this. Other people can be helpful mirrors to you to reflect back what you already know, but they can't know your truth. I may tell people a lot of stuff about what I see, but without their discernment, that's just me speaking from my perspective. One of my current favorite pictures of myself has me taking a picture of something surrounded by the vastness of nature. It's a nice reminder to me of just how small my vision is, and so too is it for all teachers, guides, visionaries, psychics, and channels. This is why you can't rely on these these third-parties. A lot of people go to their angels and spirit guides, but that's no better. They are at a level of awareness that is far broader than the human level, but they are not a repository for your answers. They're here to help love and support you so that you can clearly connect with the answers that you already have within you and so that you can also connect directly to God.

Going Into the Void, the Unknown
Of course, part of what has been at work undermining true learning is a fear of the unknown. When you have to bet on yourself, you have to take full responsibility for yourself. You can't abdicate that responsibility anymore if you are really walking the spiritual path. Anything that any teacher says is simply about helping you to connect with your own inner teacher. It certainly is nice to have some external wisdom from a person in a body on this path. I know that I've appreciated it from time to time when I used to seek out teachers for support, but the relationship with the external world teacher is always meant to be a temporary one. If you really get to the center of what spiritual teachers are doing, it's that we're here to help you live your life in love and in its fullness. If you're already doing that, then you really don't need a teacher (although perhaps you may simply enjoy the friendship of a spiritual teacher if you've crossed that threshold).

Clearing Out the Ego and Beginning from the Bottom
But most of you haven't crossed that threshold. It's not that it's hard to get to, but it's that you simply haven't brought any awareness to where you've come from, where you're going, or how you're trying to get there. True learning is about "how you're trying to get there." Obviously, the spiritual path isn't about "trying to get anywhere," but initially aspiration is important. Aspiring to be a more loving and peaceful person is a worthy thing, and it helps to generate the energy to overcome the inertia and momentum that has been driving you towards insanity and suffering. So initially, this aspiration is important as you turn to face yourself in the mirror.

More About the Role of the Spiritual Teacher
In many regards, the spiritual teacher will help you to learn again. You don't go to a spiritual teacher to get your answers. You go to the spiritual teacher to get support on the energetic level to help jumpstart the car. You go to the spiritual teacher to get tools to cut away the dead matter and debris in your heart and around your soul. You go the spiritual teacher so that you see one small way to live in a little bit more freedom and love, but you do not go to the spiritual teacher to model yourself after him or her. That's ridiculous. You just need to be you, and what the teacher is modeling is that he or she is just being the way they are. That's it. Spiritual teachers aren't without foibles and faults. They're just people, and in so doing, I think that's how we help show you that it's okay to just be human, but with a heck of a lot more love and compassion. No one is perfect, and the spiritual path is not a path to any kind of idealized perfection.


Learning Basics for Your Spiritual Journey
Okay, so that's enough framework for the common situation that's out there. And really, the old paradigm of learning just creates a shit-ton of devotees--people dedicated to a spiritual structure or even a spiritual guru. This is not walking the spiritual path as much as it looks like it. It's just playing another ego game. If you learn to really know how to absorb spiritual truths and connect with your inner knowing, you can be an enlightened accountant and be totally committed to the spiritual path.

Here are some quick hits about spiritual basics and learning:

1. It's about the message and not the messenger. The teacher is just a relay station or a helpful bridge back to yourself. No one stays on a bridge. They use it to cross over.
2. Using multiple sources. Lots of people say lots of stuff. Sometimes it's helpful when exploring different spiritual tools (meditation, chanting, etc.) to see what multiple sources have to say about the tool before using it. However, when it comes to your inner knowing, you don't want to be checking with lots of external sources to validate your inner knowing.
3. Checking information with your inner knowing--finding what feels true. I know that this is a big one for a lot of you because you don't feel like you're tuned into it.
4. Memorization is secondary or tertiary. Just because you can tell me all the Commandments or the 4 Noble Truths of Buddhism doesn't mean you're living by them. Let computers memorize.
5. Challenge untruths. If something is said to you that doesn't feel truth, challenge it. Challenge the source. You don't have to, of course. After awhile, a lot of us simply smile and let whatever is said pass unless it's a near and present danger or we're guided to say something. But in the beginning, engaging with these things from a place of inner knowing can be illuminating and may show you aspects of the source in front of you that you would not have seen.

Letting Go of Useless Information and Learning Techniques
As you can see, the true spiritual path is anything but a passive, docile one where a guru leads you by the nose and holds all your answers. This path is truly empowering and is about you owning every aspect of yourself. Along the way, you're going to see some nasty stuff about yourself--perhaps how you abuse power or how you give it away. Whatever you see will teach you a lot, and learning from those lessons about yourself is one of the most crucial aspects of learning on the spiritual path. Learning how to root out the lies you've been telling yourself and letting them go is central to everything. Because the clearer you are, the clearer your inner knowing will be, and the more you'll be able to simply trust that you know all that you need to know and can get the help you do actually need from an external source when you truly need it.

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The Many Meanings of "I Don't Know"

The Many Meanings of "I Don't Know"

"I don't know" is such a fascinating phrase. It has so many uses: some good, some bad. We use it in so many different scenarios to express different things, and at times, it can offer such a profound statement of truth that it makes your brain swirl. But I think it's important to begin to pay attention to how you use it. There are all kinds of sayings about learning to know what you don't know. And of course, it's a very powerful thing to know what you truly know--what you truly understand. And furthermore, it's a great big issue when you don't know that you don't know. You know? :)

So, here's a blog post off into the world of knowing and not knowing and some ways to view it and understand yourself.

Several Underlying Uses of "I Don't Know"
Below are a couple of the core reasons we say these three particular words.

1. Lack of information. There's a topic that we aren't sufficiently informed about, so we don't know the answer. Example: How much rocket fuel does a spaceship need to get to the moon? I don't know.
2. Avoidance of doing something that feels difficult. Very quickly, "I don't know" becomes about avoiding something. Example: Should I stay with my abusive spouse? I don't know.
3. Statement of truth. On a very deep level, there's a lot that we never really know. The mind tries to put everything into a comfortable category and structure, but even driving to work each day brings with it new-ness and unexpected happenings. Example: How long will it take you to get to work? I don't know because what if there's a car wreck?
4. Avoidance of your obligation to yourself. This is a particularly interesting one. Similar to the secnd one on the list, "I don't know" gets used a lot as a way to avoid what we actually do know. Usually, it's because we don't like the answer. Example: How long will this awakening last? I don't know (In truth, you know in your heart how long it will need, but you don't like the answer).

Step One: Releasing and Relaxing Your Mind

For many of you who are still trying to act like you know everything, "I don't know" is a powerful initial mantra. No, you don't know what is a good stock investment. No, you don't know how this relationship will work out. No, you don't even know that the sun will rise in the morning--this could be the day when it decides to go supernova, and kablammy. We live in a world where every day and every moment is a chance for rebirth, and just about the time we forget that, something happens. Kerplewy! You've got appendicitis. You thought you knew that today was a regular work day and you'd go to Monday Night Football with your buddies, but instead, you're sucking down apple sauce in a hospital bed and living on cloud nine from whatever painkiller they just gave you.

Inherit to step one is saying that you don't know what is going to happen in the external world, and surprisingly enough, your body is part of that external world. Anyone with nerve damage knows that the body is pretty separate from us. Your mind can tell you to lift an arm, but without the nerves working appropriately, it can't move. That's part of the difficulties many people have with aging. They thought that they "knew" their bodies, and in many ways, they thought they had control of them. And then, things stop working. Many people get very angry, but it's best to let go and say, "I don't know how long my body will work."

Step 2: Humility and Living Within the Unknown

I've found that the more I give myself to the unknown of the external world, the more empowered I am. It may seem like a contradiction, but really, I'm wasting so much less energy trying to force the world into a place of predictability and safety. I'm wasting so much less energy trying to convince myself that I have any clue about what's going on. It's a very humbling space to be in, but it is not a stupid one. You are not giving up any of the powers of your intellect. In many ways, you're breaking down a lot of projections that you're putting on the world, which heightens your perceptive abilities.

For instance, you always knew that the couple down the street would be married forever, and then one day they get a divorce. You're really confused. For some reason, it blows up your whole ideas about what couples will have long-term marriages. But really, you've just a projection get blown up, and you're being forced to admit how much you don't know. Especially in terms of the future, there's so little that we can even really know, and when no longer try to fit things into a framework that we know, we actually see situations more clearly since each one is unique and individual to itself no matter how similar it appears to other ones.

Step 3: Claiming Your Knowing

But at the heart of this, we're claiming a different kind of knowing. We're claiming our inner knowing. Our inner knowing can be very clear, and this is where "I don't know" is a cop-out or avoidance of our truth and what we're here to do. In this way, those 3 little words are the ways that we are scared and hiding from ourselves. Many people say that they don't know what work they love to do, what relationships they like, and so forth. But you do. You really do. You just are afraid of the consequences. Perhaps you actually think that you know what the consequences are, which shows just how confused people are in the world. So on the one hand, you say you don't know what's in your heart, and on the other hand, you're afraid to follow your heart because you think something bad will happen. But you have no idea what will happen, and only you can ever know what's in your heart and soul. We are such a mixed up people, and so we have to claim our knowing of ourselves. And in this space we have to let go of the phrase, "I don't know."

Step 4: Allowing Your Knowing to Emerge

I'm not going to tell you that your deepest knowing will emerge over night just because you said, "I've decided to know myself." I mean maybe it will. Anything is possible, and spirituality doesn't require time. Awakening to your true knowing doesn't require time. It comes in the moment when you fully let go of all the crap that you've got standing in the way. So, it can come at any time, but while you're here, maybe it's time to starting digging out the garbage. Maybe it's time to look at all the ways you've given up on yourself and sold out what you know is right to do for what is convenient, socially expected, or seemingly safe. This is part of all the spiritual work that I'm constantly talking about, and certainly as you tune into that knowing that's always been there, you're going get to get more work to do to live in integrity with God and yourself.

Step 5: The Balance of the Known and Unknown

Eventually, we work towards a balance of the known and unknown. It becomes clearer and clearer what we can know and what we can't know. This is a powerful place of being, and it helps us go a long way towards living in integrity with ourselves and in the fullness of the present moment. If you fully know that anything can happen, doesn't it make following your heart that much easier? I hear lots of people say, "Well, I'd love to do this, but that can't make me any money." And truly money isn't even at issue. At stake is the sense of safety and survival that money offers, but what if that's all a lie. And it is. It is a lie, and you have no idea if doing this thing you love will or won't make money until you do it. Certainly, there are no guarantees, but most of us are living in an illusion of safety anyway. Like I mentioned with appendicitis, there are so many ways the lives that we think are safe aren't safe at all, and if we are really miserable in this "safe" life, what kind of life is that to lead anyway?

So I encourage all of you to trust your own inner knowing. I encourage you to go inside and delve into that space to find your own truth, and meanwhile, I encourage you to let go of trying to know or predict the outside world. It is always changing, which is exactly why there's always an opportunity to manifest that which you know is truest to you and your life purpose. With so much change and energy in the air, anything truly is possible, but you already know that, don't you?

Spiritual Growth Through Embracing Your Karmic Relationships

Spiritual Growth Through Embracing Your Karmic Relationships

It's time for another blog about relationships. It's always a popular subject although I encourage you to think of "relationships" as all of your relationships with other people and perhaps also the relationship you have with yourself. People are so torn up inside that they often have multiple aspects of themselves, which all offer you lessons and mirrors about yourself. But without going too deep into that level at the moment, I think most of you know that a lot of unhealthy things currently exist in relationships. Typically, the closer you are to someone, the more issues get ignited and brought up. It's kind of a pressure cooker to be really close to someone and spend a lot of time with them. That's often the way romantic relationships are, so in this post, I want to turn your attention to the amazing opportunity that these and other relationships present.


What Are Karmic Relationships?
I think I've been spending a lot of my time in recent blogs defining stuff, but that's okay. I'm often using words in different ways than they've been used, so I want to make sure we're relatively on the same page. In general, there's lots of misunderstandings between people who think they're saying the same things and are using the same words. So if there's ever a question that you have about how I'm using a word, feel free to leave a comment. I'll do my best to clarify.

Oh, right. What's a karmic relationship? It's about 96% of all relationships going on. It's a relationship brought together in the interests of facing mutual or counterbalancing karmas and/or issues. And these relationships are unconsciously formed. I don't know too many people who choose friends based on how much they'll help kick them in the butt and force them to grow. For karma, I'm not necessarily talking about it as a past life thing, although it can be. I don't like to get down into those nuances initially because the first step for many of you will be to notice what relationships you've brought to you. The ones with mutual karmas will be those where you and a friend, partner, colleague, or whoever both have the same issue. Maybe you're both afraid to date the people you want to date. Maybe you both are very soft-spoken and are afraid to use your voices. That's an example of mutual karmas. A counter-balancing or matching karma is where a specific dynamic is at play. So the mother's son who is very weak-willed is in a relationship with a very controlling Type A woman. The hidden gift is that he's found someone who can teach him about how to stand up for himself, and she's found someone who's going to teach her about how to let go of control.

Of course the problem in 99% of these situations is that the people don't know that they're doing any of this.


Bringing Awareness to Your Relationships
This is why I said that step one is bringing awareness to your relationships. Until you understand who you're drawing to yourself and why, it's going to be tough to make changes for yourself within those relationships. Naturally, you should also be drawing attention right back to yourself. Many of these relationships should be viewed as mirrors no matter how good, bad, or down right ugly they look. You can use the many relationships in your life as amazing tools to see different aspects of yourself. Where you see repeated themes (all your friends feel powerless and controlled), you most likely have the same issue. Even when that issue may hide behind being very controlling, you too have the same issue, and these relationships are your many opportunities to work them out if you choose to do so and sometimes even if you don't. Life occasionally pulls some of us along to do the work regardless of any intellectual decisions we make. It's best to just go with it and to make the conscious decision to work on these things; it can help make things a little less messy in the long run. Or not. :)

Can't Run Away From Yourself
But of course many of you don't think you're just operating in karma. You've got nice friends and a nice romantic partner, and in general, you think your life is just fine. Great. There's a new dog video up somewhere on the Internet. Go watch that instead of reading this blog.

Still here?

Okay. Well, you must still be here for a reason, so there must be some part of you that doesn't want to run away to a puppy video just yet. And that's a start. It may put you light-years ahead of most other people who run from one relationship to the next. It's especially bad in romantic relationships. Things get hot; people see parts of themselves in their partners that they don't like see--or heck they may finally actually SEE who their partner really is when one of their projected illusions about the person breaks down; and then they bail. It doesn't give anyone a chance to learn, grow, and complete in the relationship. Which usually means the person goes and finds someone who is very similar to teach them the same lessons.

Completing in a relationship doesn't generally mean flipping someone the bird (a nasty American gesture meaning "fuck you") and driving off. Completion is very neutral. It's a beautiful space where you feel very at peace that you're done in a relationship. Usually most people can't even be with that because the ego will run in with 19 reasons why you should stay or why this is now running away. But you'll know and feel the difference.

Doing Your Own Work: The Right Partners Will Appear
Because everyone is busy worrying about having the right romantic partners to do spiritual work, we'll start there. But I have to emphasize that EVERY relationship in your life is important as a mirror, and some things may be easier to work out through a friendship than in a romantic partnership. Some issues need the intensity of romantic partnership to burn up or to be forced out of hiding. We're really good at hiding too in this society. So our crappiest and shittiest stuff can hide out way down at the bottom of the internal well of ours, and until someone and some situation squeezes the Hell out of us, it won't come up (I sure am swearing a lot; guess, it's just getting real today). Seriously, this stuff doesn't want to go even though you ultimately do want to let it go even if you don't know it now.

But you can't expect your current romantic partner to want to do this work, and it's not okay to try and force anyone to do this type of work. Your job is to notice when you get really upset and to spend time through meditation, spiritual friends, journaling, and what-not to get to the root of why something upset you. Saying that so-and-so is just being "a dick" doesn't count. So long as there isn't physical violence (in those situations, you just have to leave this person; you're not a punching bag), most of what people do is ego-bash each other. So pay attention to what feels hurt or invalidated. Why did you need to feel validated by this other person? No one is always going to like you or everything that you do. It's just not how this world works.